Who are Eric Stellwagen and Herman Chakoff? And why do they hate me?
I’ve been receiving their spam for several years now. I can only assume that at some point, they signed up for something and didn’t want to use their real e-mail addresses. Instead, they made one up–mine.
Thanks, fellas. I can never tell you how much I appreciate that.
Since then, I’ve received offers for medicines without pre$cr1ipti0ns, for discount vAcat1on$, for pr1nter ref1ll$ and for (ahem) various items that offer to enlarge body parts I don’t actually own. Personally, that is. (Speaking of which, why are there no spam ads for larger b0s0ms? Isn’t there a giant untapped market for this?)
Who’s lucky day?
A recent missive read: “Eric Stellwagen, This is your lucky day!!!!!” Well, that was certainly true, considering in whose mailbox that spam landed.
Speaking of luck, Herman seems to have way more Nigerian friends than I do. Such a popular guy! And he has to fake an e-mail? Herman, Herman, Herman. Your friends are so generous. They’ve offered to put several hundred thousand dollars into your bank account–and you can actually keep the interest accrued during that time! And you’re sending those opportunities to me? What were you thinking?
Recently, spammers seem to have discovered Yahoo and Google People Search.
Subject: Eric A Stellwagen, Watertown, Ma, 2472 Date: Thu, 27 Jan 2005 18:33:09 -0600 X-Priority: 3 X-ELNK-AV: 0 Dear Eric A Stellwagen, We would like to take this moment to review yourfinancial inquiry you made regarding your property. This is the information we have for you: 456 Belmont St Apt 19 Watertown Ma 2472 6179233928 280000 Self Employed Fixed Single Family Eric A Stellwagen, we are very confident that we can improve on your current situation. Come and visit us today and lets see what we can do for you. We have a team of professionals who are standing ready to assist you and and drastically reduce your monthly outgoings. Give us a minute of your time to let us show you what we can do Regards
Monthly outgoings? Don’t they have extra-absorbent pads for that?
It kinda makes me wonder–is this really the Eric Stellwagon
who has haunted me these many years? I suppose it’s a little late
to ask him to stop–once the spammers have an e-mail in their
nasty little hands, it’s a bit too late.
Still, you’ve got to wonder whether he’s making up other
e-mail addresses and selling them to the devil spammers.
Share your Spam horror stories…