An open letter to PETA, inspired by Ryan Lortie’s very silly My stance on Ubuntu and the Bad Vista campaign.

Dear PETA,

I realize that you think people should treat animals ethically, but let’s face it — you’re just not that popular. If you want to get people to do what you want, you should really reconsider what you want to be more in line with what people actually do.

I’m talking about vegetarianism. Specifically, you should give it up. It’s just not working.

It’s completely unrealistic to believe that people will stop eating animals. Frankly, meat is everywhere. People have already bought it. It’s in all sorts of restaurants and stores. It’s also delicious.

You don’t have a chance of convincing people to treat animals ethically until you give up some of your ideals. So go on, tell people they can eat meat. That’ll help them see that what you want is really pretty reasonable after all.

Signed,
A Helpful Friend

PS - I’ve sent similar letters to Amnesty International (they’re completely turning off dictators, despots, and torturers with their campaigns) and Habitat for Humanity (some people like living in tents — ever thought of that?). I hope you can all see my point.